En route to Europa, December, 2002...

Thanksgiving, not looking forward to being on the plane, anxious about
teaching 17 hours of group classes and 17 hours of private lessons over 5 days (so
much material!), wondering if it¹s the right thing to do to be staying for such an extended time
in Europe away from beloved Portlandia. Looking forward to tango in Padua on Dec. 7th
Felix Picherna will be Djing maybe I can pick his brains about the artŠ Full flight,
but at least I have a window exit. Interesting cultural interaction happening here at the airport. At the
ticket counter a large group of Mexicans were also flying to Houston. Most had bags and cardboard
boxes with twine around them with gifts (?) inside. None of them spoke English well and t
he people behind the counter didn¹t speak much Spanish. The man trying to tell them their maxim
um baggage allowance and $40 to buy a cheap duffel bag from the airport as they are only allowed
ONE cardboard box and one bag to check. Man behind the counter thinking they will understand
better if he raises his voice. Same man thanks me for having nothing to check on board with, ³that¹s
a first today!² Then at the boarding gate, the security line had 25 people in it, the longest
security line I¹ve ever seen at the gate. All of them were Mexicans. And airports claim that that
they don¹t racially profile, hmmŠ what a coincidence. The whole thing made me realize how
important patience and understanding are as noble virtues. Especially in tango, the
whole idea of ³walking like a Portenho² and ³do it like an Argentine² still is a difficult
concept for me to accept. Reminds me of what Cacho always says basically that it doesn¹t
matter who you are or where you come from, that tango is for everyone. Yes, belongs to
everyone, yet is the property of no one.
Dozed off on the plane and had a first time experience of waking up on a plane and not knowing
for a second where I was, and then once realizing, not knowing where I was going. Watched
³Insomnia² and then zzz againŠ
12/4/02 Houston IAH, Gate D12, 9:32am What a great weekend teaching in Austin with
Luciana! A learning experience for me as well. Woke up last Friday at 6am and was on the
road from Houston to Austin with a very generous Houston tanguera (thanks again, Nanette
for the car and a place to crash!). We made it by 9:30am, in time to teach the first class at
10am and so began the first of 17 hours. The organizer did a wonderful job the most
professional organizing I¹ve probably ever seen, PLUS it was fun to hang out with them, and
teaching/performing with Luciana is always a great honor and pleasure. What did I learn,
hmm..well, it was definitely nice to work with the same group of students over the entire
weekend took one class or so to connect with them and after they garnered our trust it was
very easy to teach them and they were all open to what we had to offer. By the end we could
see the improvement in everyone¹s dancing and they seemed excited about the tango which is
always important for me to go away with. Creating a teaching balance was the other thing that
I continued to work on. Both of us usually teach alone so we are each accustomed to ³running
the show.² We plan many of the classes together, some I do myself, and some she does
herself. Sometimes I think maybe we say too much or give too much. I tend to not want to
overload the students so I remain quieter (also because everything LU has to say is valuable
info), but sometimes I feel there may be a little imbalance towards her side. There was only
positive feedback about the workshops and the weekend seemed a big success. We¹ll be back
next year teaching/performing along with (gulp! One of MY teachers) Fabian Salas and Carolina
and Julio and Corina. It was also and important that the organizer did a great job of keeping us
fed, hydrated and running things on time. The few times that we were tempted to go back on
Argentine time for the classes, the organizer reminded us that we were on the northern side of
the equator.

12/5/02 9:52am at the Milano Centrale train station in Italy. 2 hours to kill for the next ³Val
Padana² to Venice so what better thing to do than to write. Nice to travel without definite
plans. Kind of exciting, I almost forgot. It¹s almost as if I get to know Alex better when I¹m
away from my usual surroundings or maybe it¹s the opposite, that by abandoning my usual
surroundings I abandon myself and can therefore reflect better on my ³usual² life (though I
wouldn¹t call it usual by any means!). Either way it feels really good, like being really alive,
knowing my intentions. I think all the things like running the studio, running errands, paying
bills, doing administrivia all take away time from what matters to me most
playing/composing music, dancing, teaching and being what I always wanted to be as a kid a
creative mind and an inventor. I should maybe consider getting a secretary/manager so I can
pay more attention to what I love the most.
I feel at home with my backpack on one shoulder and my bandoneon on the other, plastic bag
of ³pane², oranges and spicy salami sitting here at this immaculate train station. They sure
don¹t build stations now they way they used to such enormous works of art yet with such
fine detail. It¹s at the same time a grotesque display of wealth and an artistic masterpiece.
Hmm, I¹m still not far away enough from non-English speaking locals every time I attempt
my Italian I get a reply in English sometimes I don¹t even have to open my mouth and they
speak in English!
Wanting to break out the bandoneon, but my shyness, insecurity and preoccupation with lack of
practice all prohibit me from doing it. SomedayŠ
The issue of the individual¹s relationship to society keeps running through my head, because
its microcosm rears its head very strong in the tango world. My first opinions seem to be very
³Rand-ish² but then I start thinking more. At what point does one start to compromise the
self for the benefit of society? And if the individual is part of society, then by compromising
the self in a sense is also compromising a part of society. It seems to me that the individual is
like a cell in the body most are relatively similar, though maybe with different fxns and
groups. Viva comunismo, I guess is what that suggests, hmmŠ Seems like an individual that
is not detrimental to society because of their selfish actions could still be virtues. Maybe
even the interest of the individual is also in the best interest of society or beyond that, that the
interest of the individual is society. It amazes me that people knowingly take advantage of a
capitalist society by exploiting resources and workers, or even pulling things like the Enron
exec¹s makes me sick.
So I guess this applies to the tango world in that if any tanguero exploits others it¹s detrimental
to the community and not so much whether people conform or do things that don¹t
compromise their interests, but is not detrimental to a community. That was a lot of words
someday I¹ll be able to communicate more clearly :)

Met Carrie at Santa Lucia stazione in Venice and were thinking of going to Padua to get a hotel
room (cheaper), but were approached by this guy offering a place for real cheap. 2 minutes
from the train station and not so bad a place simple, but clean. Then we took a ³vaporetto²
down the Grand Canal and were in awe. Such a beautiful city even the rapidly deteriorating
buildings have a human charm and reminder of the temporal. We walked back a ³20-minute²
walk according to the hotel manager, but took us an hour. We heard bells and thought
erroneously that those were the warnings we had heard about that the town was going to be flooded
soon by the ever increasing high tides. We were on a mission not to get stuck without our
galoshes and we thought ³it¹s a bad sign when the locals are walking fast.² Turns out there was
no flood that evening. The next morning I heard sirens and woke up to a partially submerged Venice.

12/6/02 Walked all day, bought a ticket for ³La Traviata² for the 15th, ate the wonderful local fare,
and thought it was a dream. In the evening I tried calling a local organizer, but he gave me
the wrong number. Went to an internet café and looked up the tango Venice site, but the
³Milonghe² section was under construction. Drat. So I went under the special workshops sub-link
and a year ago there was one workshops at a place called the ³Casanova Café² I looked it up
on the internet and to my surprise the internet café I was sitting was the Casanova café! I asked
the bartender if there was tango there and she said ³ Yes, tonight starting at midnight² Fantastico!
Now, time to kill before the evening. Writing postcards, transferring all of the above
to the computer, checking e-mails, running my milonga from afar, eating some leftover stale
bread and delicious prosciutto crudo with provolone dolce, mmmŠ
Damn! We went with high expectations to the Casanova café and when we walked in there
was only Œ80¹s techno music playing. We asked the doorman if there was tango tonight and he looked
at us strange and said there was South American dancing, salsa and merengue. I asked
again ³No, tango?² He seemed to get annoyed. ³No!² Ok, we left defeated. I felt really, really
frustrated a similar feeling when I¹m driving to a milonga right on time and then hit heavy
traffic, this feeling of helplessness, and tonight, realizing there was no other place to go made
me really antsy. We went for a walk instead to release some of the pent up energy. It helped a little,
but I just needed to sleep. At least there will be tango in Padua tomorrow.

12/7/02 Walking all day, getting lost amongst the winding, narrow streets, taking pictures of
doorknobs and windows.

Friendly old Venetian man offered to take our picture. I don´t think he was used to digital photography...

Friendly old Venetian man offered to take our picture. I don´t think he was used to digital photography...

Inspired with creative thoughts of all the things I could do with my studio. In the evening I
called the Padua tango number and the woman reassured me that there was a milonga tonight. I
asked twice and got directions. Then called Marco and he confirmed there was going to be a
milonga there and offered a ride. Yippee!!! Practiced the bandoneon a little, though the walls
are thin in this hotel and I don¹t want anyone to get annoyed with my practicing. Wrote some
postcards as well. Time to leave. Got my best shirt on, clean smelling, no wrinkles and
everything!
So, while waiting for Marco to pick us up at the Piazzale Roma in Venice a car pulled up and
blinked its lights. I thought it was Marco and the driver even waved. So I opened the door and
was about to get in when I asked ³Marco?² and he said ³No!² Oops. Another one of those
embarrassing tourist moments. So Marco and his girlfriend picked us up and we headed to
Padua. The milonga at the neo-classical café ³Café Pedrocchi² had beautiful ambiance,
wonderful music by Picherna, and many dancers all dressed to the nigh. I¹ve seen better line of
dance at a pig round up, but the people were friendly and I had a nice time. I ran into an old
Italian friend, Stefano, that I had met in BsAs 3 years ago. I thought it was him and he
immediately recognized me. We had a good chat. Picherna¹s music format was interesting
there is so much emphasis on good tango Djing on the importance of the ³traditional format² of
3-5 tangos, in 3 or so sets followed by milongas and valses, but Picherna completely threw that
system out of the window and still created a fantastic evening. H e showed at the same time
the irreverence of a teenager and the creativity of a genius. Fantastic. I didn¹t get to chat with
him much, but am still wondering if DJ¹s like that because he is in Italy, or has he always sort of
done it that way, even in BsAs. He played a lot of Pugliese, sometimes a candombe and one
milonga followed by 2 D¹Arienzo and some more Pugliese and a cortina. Then Troilo/Marino (4 songs)
3 valses and Troilo again. Lots of D¹Arienzo, Troilo and Pugliese, which I remember
he had also done in Amsterdam two years ago at the Tango Magia festival. I think there are
alternative formats for Djing, and I¹m inspired to go back to the US and create something new.
Before we entered we saw everyone was wearing suits or nice shirts and slacks and the women
mostly had beautiful long dresses on. More formal than we had expected. I felt like ¹68 VW
bug in a world of 2003 Mercedes Benz¹s. Also when Carrie and I were dancing a couple on
the sidelines commented with hand gestures to each other amazing the difference in height.
Interesting to me to realize that even though Carrie is 5¹2² (and I¹m 6¹4²) she seems to project
herself as being much taller. No spread at the milonga so on the ³Milonga Spread Scale²
(MSS), which runs between one and five, it got a lowly 1 (instead of zero because the bar
service was good and friendly) : ) We drove home around 2am and I felt like a new man.
Tango is definitely a drug with which I cannot seem to live without. Sounds corny, I know,
but it¹s what I need. ZzzŠ

12/8/02 Jet lag effecting Carrie, but not me (I got a head start in Texas). At least we¹re both
awake in the late morning and in the evening for dancing. Went for a stroll in Venice, bought a
few gifts, took a nap and then caught the 20:07 IR to BolognaŠmore dancing to be done. We
entered the usual Sunday milonga in Bologna and I said a few hellos to people I knew. It was
nice to be remembered and made me feel a little bad for all the people whose names I have
forgotten. The DJ welcomed me during a cortina. But it was strange, I hadn¹t been in Bologna
for a year and now I didn¹t recognize hardly anyone there. I asked my friend what was
happening and she said that in the past years different schools have been slowly separating
from each other so now each milonga gets its own unique clientele. Bummer. There was great
music and ambiance, but I was expecting to see all the usual Bolognese tangueros. I talked with
a teacher at the milonga and to my surprise he even seemed to think that it was a good idea that
this split was happening ³more room at the milongas,² ³each milonga having its own flavor,²
and other things unconvincing ideas. I was excited to be there, but also wasn¹t connecting very
well with anyone except a few dancers. Still curious as to what effects this. The mood you are
in plus the mood your partner is in, how you perceive each other, and add in a little music and
you get a tango connection soufflé.
12/9/02 Mate in the morning, walking all afternoon, listening to Gypsy Caravan and cooking
in the evening. No milonga tonight within a 150 mile radius. They say you have to have
suffered to dance the tangoŠdoes missing an evening of dancing qualify?

12/10/02 To Rome on the 17:55 Eurostar. Arrived around 9pm, checked into
the Hotel Cervio, took a shower and headed out to my first Roman milonga
experience. We arrived by Metro and then walked 10 minutes. Down a dark
alley and under a farol stood the words ³Tangopolis² (which pronounced in Italian
sounds exactly like ³Tango Police²) We entered. There was going to be a concert
for bandoneon and bass. $6 to get in. Most people were on their way out.
There were only about 12 or so people left. The décor was warehousy with
Caminito painted along one wall, a shrine with candles of old tango hereos, a
projection of tango art, and a small bar. The place was intimate and stark at the
same time that¹s how I like it, and is actually how I first imagined that my studio
would look like. We put on our shoes, said hello to the owner, whom I had met
before in Holland and danced a little. Then the live music came on. I found that
since my ears were accustomed to the amplified, canned music when the
bandoneon started it sounded shy and weak. It was so quiet that when he
finished the first song ³Trasnochando², a solo, no one clapped. It was nice though,
intimate music in a intimate place it reminded me of how perhaps tango first started,
without the precision, the perfection. Everything was a little quiet, or a little
rusty, and that¹s how I like it. It has a more human quality to it. We danced with
some of the locals and then got talking to a few of them, figuring out where
tomorrow and Thursday¹s milongas would be and trying to find a ride back to the
hotel. The owner found us a ride, but refused to let us go until we sang a few
tangos with him and the pianist. I¹m not good at singing and was shy at first, but
after he started and another man chimed in I felt right at home. It was like the scene
late night of a rowdy tavern or so. We sang a lot of Gardel and even got Carrie
to join in the owner absolutely prohibited silence during the next 15 minutes. At
the end we got a ride back to the hotel, but had to be up early the next morning to
see the Pope, Sistine Chapel, St. Peter¹s Basilica, the Coliseum, the Pantheon,
etc.

12/12/02 Komala¹s birthday! Too bad we¹re in Rome and are not able to
celebrate with her.

Ruins of a milonga from the ancients...

More walking (for Rome, a lifetime is not enough). In the evening we went to the
Thursday night milonga on via dei Serpenti 32. From Termini we took the metro
to via Cavour and then walked up Serpenti. The numbers were rising on the right
side of the road and diminishing on the left! Disorienting at first, but that didn¹t stop
us from our adventure down these garbage-laden streets (the garbage service
happened to be on strike along with the workers at the Palatine, amazing how the
trash piles up so quicklyŠ). So we entered, walked down the hall and opened
the door. It was about 11pm and we were early. They asked for money at the
door, and were debating whether or not to charge us the ³tessatura² which is a sort
of tax you need to pay as an individual to occupy a space (good for one year).
They let us pass and we went in, with Troilo getting louder with every step. There
were only about 12 people when we got there, but by 1am or so the place was
hoppin¹. The floor was conveniently being washed during the evening by a hole
in the ceiling which seemed to harness the rain and filter it onto the dance floor in
random areas. There were also loose boards on the verge of breaking through to
the basement put there, I imagine to give more spring and to save the knees of
the dancers. The DJ did an excellent job I was on the floor the whole evening. It
was only our second night there, so it took us a while to get to know people and
circulate enough so that the evening would roll on by its own momentum. It¹s a
little bit of work and takes some self confidence and even courage to enter a social
situation where you know hardly anyone and the goal of the evening is to connect
with people. Add on top of that the language barrier (I know some Italian, but not
enough I guess to sustain the interest of the locals), and a sort of feeling that the
leaders maybe don¹t like me that much, and it makes it seem a daunting task. But
it¹s fun, and challenging and forces me to be myself and to conquer my innate
shyness. It was reinforced for me that evening that a good attitude is what it¹s all
about. I danced with a beginner who seemed focus, attentive, and musical and it
was very enjoyable to me kind of a feeling of sharing. The night ended around
3am and a local tanguera was nice enough to get a ride home. Susana Miller was
in the car with us and we had some nice conversation about life, traveling, etc.
She¹s kind to me and loving in a motherly kind of way. I wonder if she would be
opposed to me calling her my portenha madreŠ

12/13/02 Brioche in bed with acqua frizzante and clementine oranges (why are
good clementines so hard to find in the states?). In the evening I set out for the
Friday night milonga at via delli Angeli. Getting there was an adventure: Thursday
evening a dancer had sketched directtions to the place it was on the outside of
the city. By the appearance of his sketch one would have thought that the
milonga was only a few blocks from the Porta Furba metro station. I got out of the
station and was completely disoriented. I asked a cop where it was and he said
³one misha ina tat direction and then one misha to the right.² Wow, didn¹t know it
would be so far. So I set out by foot since it was a nice evening. Slowly the
sidewalk ended and the busy streets were narrowing. Through some tunnels that
I had to time with the traffic in order not to get hit.

The pope was DJing today...

Had been walking for a while when I decided to ask someone for directions. I
backtracked a little according to the advice of a local and headed down a street that
he claimed was the one I wanted, though my directions said otherwise. I was
going on trusting a stranger rather than a sketch of a dancer. More obstacle
courses, less street lights until luckily I saw a sign that said via Delli Angeli. I turned
down it and was accompanied by corn fields and stars. Then I saw the sign for the
club and headed down a dirt path with puddles. I was finally calmed by the
comforting sound of tango music. I entered, walked to the cashier and waited for
about five minutes in front of the person behind the counter while they were
administering me the usual Roman hospitality by finishing a full length conversation
with their friend before taking my money. I guess a more effective method would
be to just walk in and have them demand that you pay. Anyway, I had to pay the
tessatura of $6 and then the entrance was $7! It seems like prices have risen
dramatically since last year when I remember milongas being between 8000-
10,000 lire (about $3.50-$5). It turned out to be well worth the price of
admission. I had great dances all night long and met many people. Some familiar
faces from the previous nights whom always seemed to want to greet me with a
handshake and an English salutation, and also Vikas from SF was there! Samll
worldŠ nice to see a familiar face. We agreed to a trade of a private lesson for
him in return for a place to stay for the night for us a great trade. Picherna was
Djing again! He went through his usual romp and ramp through the evening with a
colorful collage of ever-changing orchestras and talking and whistling in the middle
of songs. While I was dancing with a tanguera nmed Ana Maria he called out
over the mike in the middle of a D¹Arienzo/Echague tune ³Che ballerina fantastica
es Ana-Maria.² Another time he was advertising a milonga on December 28th in
the middle of a vals! Crazy, but the way he was doing it seemed to flow with the
music, it wasn¹t so much an irritation for me (as some locals told me it was for
them), as it was a mild comedic interlude. The night ended for me around 3:30am
when there was a ride available who was heading in the direction of Termini and
departing immediately. Vikas and I were dropped off near the terminal and had a
nice chat while walking towards the hotel Cervia. In bed by 4am. Zzz..

12/14/02 Went to Vikas¹ place and then the three of us went for a walk through
the historic neighborhood of Trastevere. He was a wonderful guide, and a person
with such an uplifting, positive perspective of life. We had a nice lunch at a
restaurant ³La Scala,² I had my usual bruschette and spaghetti alla carbonara and
topped it off later at gelateria with some gelato and a capucho. I gave Vikas his
private lessons great working with him lots of questions answered for him.
Practiced the bandoneon a bit, fixed myself some mate, got ready for the milonga
and headed out again, catching the H bus from Trastevere to La Nazionala and via
dei Serpenti (same place as Thursday night). We arrived around 10:45 or so and
the doors were still locked, so we went for a pastry. We returned around
11:20pm and things were just getting fired up only about 6 people or so. I
danced a little, but then found that the music was so loud (even for me which is
rare as I usually like the music at deafening levels leftover from my youth when I
listened to punk music, I guess). It was so loud during one vals that I danced out
into the lobby with Carrie where the levels were tolerable for my ears. I told the
organizer and he said something like ³Well, there aren¹t many people. You see,
when there are more bodies in the room it absorbs the sound and is quieter.²
Thanks. So I got a free lesson in basic acoustics, but it didn¹t help any. He saw
me sitting longer and I think started to think and went over to turn down the sound.
Unfortunately he wasn¹t the DJ and when the DJ came back to the podium and
changed the CD he brought the levels up even higher than before! I was pissed
off, but what could I do? Leave and go home unfulfilled? Tell the DJ again and
risk him becoming defensive about ³his style² of Djing? Stay and suffer the slings
and arrows of acoustic misfortune, as one tango maestro told me in a private
lesson? I sat in the cold lobby mumbling to myself like a grumpy old man. Later
on the levels came down, but it was tough to get out of my psychological rut. I
had a few nice dances near the end of the evening, but then had to cut a short set
shorter in order to catch the 2:30am bus back to Trastevere, which never showed
up. Home by 3am, asleep by 3:03am

12/15/02 Rose all too early, rush to pack, catch the H to Termini and hop on the 1
0:55am Eurostar to Venezia. Thought ìLa Traviataî was at 8pm like all the other
concerts, but it turned out to have started at 5pm. We were late, but the opera was
around 2.5 hours, so we only missed the overture and first scene.

12/16/02 Off to Munich. Arrived, Florian met us at the station with his usual
smile and enthusiasm. We dropped off our stuff and headed to the practica at KHG.
It was downstairs in a room that resembled something like a psychedelic fishbowl,
with a tiled floor and some yummy German Christmas pastries. Saw some old
friends ñ itís strange that sometimes I can have wonderful conversations and/or
dances with people and know them really well, and then a year later itís like meeting
them for the first time again. It takes me a while to connect with old friends again ñ
we share old memories, but the feelings and sensations are mostly gone. Anyway, I
had some nice dances. At 2am we headed ìhome.î
12/17 Went to some of the Christmas markets, the Tollwood festival, and then a
cafÈ at Beethovenís Platz where there was some pretty good jazz ñ some of the first
jazz Iíve heard outside of the states. We headed then to the usual Tuesday night
shindig a la Max E. Brauerei. More old acquaintances, but I was surprised how
much the guard had changed. That happens in most the larger communities that I
visit ñ people tend to come and go, or dance infrequently so it seems like every night
is a new place. I wonder if they dance less in larger communities because the sense
of an intimate gathering has been lost, or if there are just so many events that no one
place will represent the entire community.
Itís strange for me, and when I feel this sense of ìwhere is everyone?î it makes me
realize once again how important a strong sense of community is when I go out to
dance.
So, all in all a good evening ñ I connect well with the host, Mundo, which also
makes the place nicer to go to. He remembers me, will play nice music, and seems
like a well balanced dude.

12/18 And on the seventh dayÖ

12/19 Full moon out, which is the commercial every month for Munichís ìFull-
moon milongaî at this one guyís house. Also a nice place ñ you feel free there. He
is welcoming, and even though when you enter through the kitchen and donít know
anyone, no one really cares how you look or how you dance. Everyone brings
something little to eat or a bottle of wine and you have a relaxed party that everyone
is invited to. Once again I only recognized a few people, though some had heard of
me from their friends from my previous visits. The floor was really slick which was
great for working on arrivng on axis and accelerating well below the lead/follow-
connection-acceleration limit for dancing. A fire burned in the background as the
12-disc CD player turned out tunes under the direction of DJ ìRandomî (sometimes
you get very interesting combinations when the CD player is set on random). Out of
there by 1am ñ Florian had to perform surgery the next morning at 7:30am. We
hopped into his famous ìWerkstatt Wagenî and after an adventurous ride back home
we had a tea, then a Campari soda, and then a pillow.

12/20/02 Friday, hmm, oh yes I gave some private lessons, made a delicious
stromboli and salad dinner, and we walked over to the practica at ìEl Corazonî from
Streissheimer Str. Walked in, again hardly knowing anyone, said hello to the
wonderful hostess, Maja, and danced. Had an experience that evening again of
striking up mild conversation between dances which led to me inadvertently
advertising my next dayís workshop (ìWhy are you in Munich? Oh, when are your
workshops? Great! Is there still room?). So a few more students registered for the
Saturdayís ìTango fuer Feinschmeckerî (ìGourmet Tangoî) workshops. Ended
around 1am, nice evening, nice space, and even nicer with a few new additions after
the Feng-shui expert had given them a few tips.
12/21/02 Workshops at 2pm. Me my usual nervous self wondering what the level
will be, if they all speak English, if the group will be homogeneous, will I connect
with them, etc. The skin around my fingernails were beginning to slowly disappear
from my nervous nibbling. Turns out the class was fantastic. Everyone brought
some food, the classes seemed interesting to them, and everyone enjoyed it I think.
It made me want to teach more, inspired me to come back to Munich again to teach.
In the evening we went to a birthday party for 3 tango dancers turning 40. They
rented out the space at Max E., and had a wonderful meal prepared, good music, and
dancing until 2am. Most of the guardia vieja from 3 years ago were there and happy
to all reunite again in one evening.

12/22/02 Yawn, grump, stretch, some wandering around the city ñ to Marienplatz,
a restaurant, checking e-mails, making calls, writing the journal, practicing
bandoneon, and contemplating my navel.

12/23/02 Reading Hesseís Siddhartha, playing the fuelleÖ

12/24 Happy Holidays.

12/25 Off to Nijmegen. The train ticket we had reserved didnít seem to match any
of the times and numbers that were running that afternoon. I found out that our
ticket was to have left at 1:08 am, and not 1:08 pm. No problem for the occasionally
baffled train crew. Stopped in Cologne and had a 2 hour pitstop at a bar adjacent to
the Dom cathedral. We arrived in Nijmegen at 10:07pm ñ I was excited to be there
ñ El Corte carries a special place in my tango heart ñ has been an inspiration and the
seed of many of my creative ideas. I was walking fast to the yellow door on
Graafsweg. Entered El Corte and noticed the changes that had been completed since
I was last there. Greeted Eric, gave Komala a big kiss and flowers for her birthday
which we missed on Dec. 12th. The shoes were on, and dancing was to be done.
There were mostly Dutch participants, which I guess is no surprise because most
people are with their families then, and the perhaps the people that were there need
an excuse to get away from the big family ordeal. There was the usual fantastic
dinner ñ fish was the 25th ingredient du jour, which tasted great, but was unfortunate
for Carrie since she doesnít care for fish. There were the usual dance cards with a
mystery partner that you had to find before the mystery partner dance at midnight,
and Eric and Komalaís wonderfully fitting El Cortian attitude. A great evening and
a wonderful way to spend Christmas, though it would be nice to see the family too
since we so rarely all get together.

12/26 A lazy day in El Corte playing Jenga, up-side-down Scrabble, practicing the
bando, eating my Doner Durum and crashing. At 4am or so Eric was downstairs in
his office and had a violent fit of what was either laughter or crying for half an hour
or so.

12/27 To Amsterdam for the Tango Magia festival. Arrived around 1pm, checked
into the ìHotel Roszetratenî (actually an apartment of a wonderful friend of oursÖ)
and headed to CREA where the workshops were being held. The 2pm class we
signed up for was Milonga with Sabrina and Ezequiel. Sabrinaís an old friend of
mine from BsAs; thereís a small group of us that would always take lessons with
Damian and Nancy, and of that group almost all of us have either gone on to become
teachers or performers ñ itís great! So I surprised Sabrina ñ it brought back
memories of my very first visit to BsAs and the amazing 2 months that I spent there.
I reminded Sabri that our first ever tango exhibitions was performed together 5 years
ago ñ she said yes, she still has the pictures. The class was nice ñ very relaxed with
a little bit of joking and a manner of teaching that seemed to say ìHello! Donít think
so much, just shut-up and dance!î For example they snuck in a boleo for which
Ezequiel explain ìYou just give a little shakeÖî He laughed a little with some of
the others in the class as if to explain that we would need much more time to really
explain how the boleo works. At 4pm we had some lunch with some friends from
SF and then head to the free afternoon milonga at the Barbizon Hotel. Definitely my
best dances of the festival were there ñ a relaxed atmosphere, great music, and great
dancers with no pressure whatsoever. At 8pm we grabbed at sandwich and fries
with peanut sauce and hooped on the number 17 tram to the Meervaart theater for
the evening milonga. We arrived around 9:15pm and the opening show
ìTurbulenciaî had already started. I donít go so much for dancers trying to act, the video
projection behind the dancers was nice, and the story seemed a bit incomplete (I
have a small capacity for understanding things that overburdened with excess
metaphors and fuzzy symbolism), but the dancing was the strongest it has ever been
at the festival in my opinion. Then the milonga started and I had a rotten evening
though couldnít figure out why. Went home in despair (What if this will always
happen when I go out dancing?), but after a hot cup of tea and a good nightís sleep I
was ready for action again.

12/28/02 Got up around 12:30pm thinking that we had a class at 2pm, arriving and
realizing that the class was at 10:45am already. Went to the Easy Everything
internet place and caught up with my 75 unread messages waitingÖ Found out a
biography was just publish about my grandfather, in German, which is unfortunate
for me b/c my German isnít quite up to it yet. Many holiday e-mails ñ many from
Portlanders making me really miss home. So, off to the Barbizon palace. Remi was
Djing (great stuff, thank you Remi!) and I had many wonderful dances again. In the
evening the milonga was at the Beurs van Berlage ñ a huge floor which I remember
from last year had around 1000 participants and many wreckless drivers on the floor.
This year it was much better ñ I guess the popularity of tango has waned since the
prince of Holland was married to an Argentine over a year ago now. Color Tango
was playing ñ their first set had some unusual arrangements, but enjoyable
nonetheless (especially their rockiní version of ìAl Galopeî). Gustavo and Giselle
Ann and Pablo and Veronica did some wonderful demonstrations for us ñ each
couple has their unique style ñ Pablo and Veronica did some simple, but interesting
things that I had never seen before, and Gustavo and Giselle Anne could just walk
for all it matters ñ they just move so beautifully. I felt a little stalked during the
evening and had to keep my eyes a little low so I could also get a few peaceful
moments during the evening. The night ended around 3:30am, we walked home
picking up some pommes with peanut sauce on the way.

12/29/02 Off to class at 2pm ñ A musicality workshop with the Color Tango
orchestra. What an amazing class, on different levels. They went through the
history of the tango through examples that you could dance to for two hours! It was
like getting a private concert! There were only 10 people in the class which was
nice while taking the class, but a little disappointing considering that the music
needs to come before the dancing ñ it would be great if everyone who wanted to
learn tango took this class first before dancing ñ I think it would help them to
understand the music much more. Iíve never heard the layerings in the tangos like
that before ñ Iíve taught the different layers, but when each layer is played without
any other instruments it sounds completely unique. After class I told Roberto
Alvarez (the director/bandoneonist) if he would be interested in the idea to make a
CD for tango teachers and put each layer on a separate track and then the entire song
in order for them to use to teach. He said it was a good idea and that they would
seriously consider it. Cool! Off to the Barbizon for dancing all afternoon (wonderful
again, as always) and then back to the Meervaart for the double concert with Sexteto
Canyengue and Color Tango. This concert was unbelievable ñ it was the fountain
for so much inspiration to dance, to play music, to compose, arrange ñ my mind was
overloading and I felt a natural high (aah, Amsterdam). I remember thinking to
myself ìthis is it, this is why Iím dancing ñ I have to remember this feeling when I
go back and dance to the recordings.î The dancing started ñ I had a s- so night
except for wonderful sets with Carrie and Komala. Taxi home around 3am.

12/30/02 - beg/int technique with Geraldine and Javier at 2am. It was a very good
class, interesting in both the material they covered and their approach to it. He was
very forward with his idea that the follower should just follow or else ìPlaf, plaf,
fuera de aqui!î motioning a slap of the face to the imaginary follower, and saying
the leaders must turn like a bull fighter and the ìvacaî should keep turning until she
gets tired. Aside from Javier and my own cultural differences and the fact that
Geraldine didnít say much (which is too bad), I learned a lot as both a teacher and a
dancer. Felipe was also in the class and the whole time was looking at me as if to
say ìcan you believe this? Very interestingÖî Off to the Barbizon for dancing all
afternoon (wonderful again, as always) and then to the Krakeling for a final farewell
showdown and to see my friend Sabrina perform. The night was fun, even though
the space is a little strange with two rooms ñ one being a theater (which is strange
having an audience on risers watching you). And the other rooms had a funky floor
and a crowded cafÈ atmosphere. A few wonderful surprise sets and then at 3am they
wanted to stop the music. The Argentine table started clapping and pounding the
feet for around 10 minutes until the music started again. They made the mistake of
playing some late DíArienzo which blew the tops off the dancers and they asked for
more. There must have been 6 encores before the manager of the place put her foot
down and the music finally ended. We froze on the walk home.
12/31 Late start, but made it in time to the train station to catch a train to
Nijmegen. Arrived around 6pm or so, checked into the Mercure (my first time
staying there ñ what a wonderfully accommodating place!). Took a nap and then
headed to El Corte along with others from the hotel around 10pm and the marathon
began once again. Great music by their usual DJ, champagne, kisses and fireworks
at midnight and dancing until 9am ñ when the nice, cozy, warm, fresh smelling room
at the hotel was calling me. Zzz.

1/1/03 Happy new one. Return to El Corte arounjd 5pm and danced some more.
To my shock and surprise there were a few people still dancing from the night
before! And I thought I was hardcore ñ itís hard to imagine the body can sustain
itself dancing for that long (Bravo Homer and Thais!). I was exhausted at 2am ñ my
body was starting to feel fatigue from the previous week and dancing became more
of an effort than an enjoyment so I decided to head in early. It was nice though ñ I
had a great time, the food was wonderful and the dancing, line of dance, music and
atmosphere was unparalled (Bravo El Corte crew!).

1/2/03 Downstairs at the hotel too late for breakfast. Headed to El Corte with all
our things and then went downtown for a walk. Lots of ìVerkoopî (ìSaleî) signs,
buy, buy, buyÖ Checked e-mail at a grocery store, bought a DVD, returned to El
Corte and vegged some more.

1/3/03 Headed to Antwerpen in the afternoon, great dinner at the ìEleventh
Commandmentî ñ a restaurant with all religious paraphernalia as dÈcor. Then off to
the milonga – a cozy little place called “El Sur.” The host was very welcoming and
the bartenders invited me to a few of the wonderful local Belgian ales. While
drinking one of them, “Duvel,” (literally “devil”) everyone kept warning me –
“don’t drink more than one!” or “ooo, careful my friend.” Apparently this unassuming
beer has as much alcohol content as wine does. I’m no beer fan, but the Belgian ales
tasted very good. So then a Dutch teacher, Esther, and I did a performance. We
started with Pugliese’s version of “Nochero Soy” -- we connect best through
Pugliese. It went really well and the crowd seemed to enjoy it. The dance floor was
really long and narrow – most people were sitting on end of the room, but there were
a handful on the far side, so once in a while I would take the biggest steps via some
repeating combo to the far end to dance for them a little and then return. The second
song was a vals of the DJ’s choice. I think more and more I enjoy it when I don’t
know what song I’m going to perform to. The people I’m dancing with always seem
a little hesitant to do this – maybe through bad previous experiences, but every time
that I’ve done it I have had a good time and there has been more a spontaneous
element to the performance. There was an encore and we decided to do a tango-
milonga, which is the easiest for me in a way and a good number to end on. The rest
of the evening was enjoyable. One woman asked me to dance before the
performance, not knowing that I was going to do a performance, and then after the
performance she apologized to me (!) saying she would have never asked had she
known. I asked her why, and said that it doesn’t matter, we’re all just here to dance
and it doesn’t matter who I am or what I do. We stayed to the end, and
unfortunately I left my entire case of CD’s under my chair and would not get them
back until two weeks later in the UK.

1/4/03 – Headed back to Nijmegen for the chained-salon weekend. There was a
changing of the tango guard – many new faces and old friends. A great time, as
usual in El Corte. The only problem was a horrific German snorer that kept all the
occupants awake for an hour or so. Aargh.

1/5/03 Lazy day…

1/6/03 Off to Amsterdam, checked into the Hotel Rosezstraten again, fixed a meal (is it
lunch? Dinner?), checked e-mail and headed to the CafÈ DeKroon. I always have a
nice time dancing there and this evening was no exception. Yvonne Meissner
wanted to form a temporary partnership in the future, so she suggested the idea of
giving a demo together so that people would have an idea of what we do. No
problem. We danced 3 songs, it was as wild as always, though we slowed down a
bit on Pugliese’s “La Mariposa” which we ended with. Interesting talking with her
later about it she felt as though the last song was our weakest of the three. The rest
of the evening was great. We walked home and got some pommes on the way.

1/7/03 We had a coaching session with Carmen in the afternoon which was fantastic –
she has such a great eye for movement. Then I had dinner with Yvonne and we
decided to teach in Italy together in Decmber, 2003. The milonga at Moeders
Mooiste began around 9pm – another wonderful evening though all too short, and
the restaurant is starting to hide their trays of salty licorice and mints I think because
the dancers were subbing them for a meal…

1/8/03 Practicing in the afternoon for 3 hours and then to this place that I’ve
always wanted to eat at “Eat As Much As You Like In 1 Hour $7.50” I had to find
out what kind of food they had and maybe more interestingly who their clientele was
(hungry pot-smokers?). The food wasn’t great, though the dim-sum was fresh and
yummy. I went back four times and my belly ached at the end of our hour. It felt
satisfying though. We walked home, practiced bandoneon, and Zzz…

1/9/03 Off to Edinburgh. When we arrived We went straight to the studio where I gave
three private lessons, then practiced a bit before going out to eat at the “Buffalo
Grill.” We took the bus back to the organizer’s house and Zzz…

1/10/03 privates and practicing for most of the day. A little walking tour to the castle
and along the Royal Mile.

1/11/03 6 hours of workshops that went really well. It was much easier now that I
knew pretty much everyone and the level of the dancers in each class was fairly
homogeneous. Went to Suzie’s Restaurant afterwards and ate, drank and chatted for
five hours before going to bed.

1/12/03 Another 6 hours of classes, a strange dinner at a kebab house (closed on
Fridays from 1-2pm for prayer, and only halal meat), and then went for dessert at a
great little Italian place called “Ciao, Roma.” We headed back to the studio where
there was a milonga from 7pm to 11:30pm. A very enjoyable, and busy, evening.

1/13/03 privates all morning and afternoon, practicing, eating, sleeping…

1/14/03 Off to London, checked into the “Hotel Lipic” (the organizer, Biljana’s, house
where I usually stay. Thanks B.! And good luck in Yugoslavia.), fixed a batch of
tomato soup, opened a bottle of Argentine wine and made myself at home. Went to
a milonga in the evening at the Factory. There was a class with Leandro and Andrea
from 7:30-9pm and then a milonga. At the end of the class most of the people left –
including the teachers. It was a very quiet atmosphere, though friendly and with
nice music. The room smelled a little like people had worked hard in the class, and
at 11pm shapr the music was off and before we could get our coats and shoes on the
lights were being shut off. We grabbed our stuff and finished putting on our jackets
while walking down the stairs. It’s strange – I wonder why London milongas mostly
last only for 2 hours or less? It was $8 each to get in which I also thought was a
little pricey considering there was no spread, drinks, etc. Oh well.

1/15/03 Practiced bandoneon and had a nice chat in the morning with Pernille. Off to the Dome in the evening to give the lesson before the milonga. Good turnout, and it’s always enjoyable teaching Londoners – they seem receptive, open to new methods of teaching, and are a positive bunch. The milonga was great (thanks, Os, for the nice music!) We left with an old friend who offered us a ride.

1/16/03 Off to Cambridge in the morning, arrived in time to prepare my evening’s class and chat a bit. The class was close embrace for intermediates. Went well – it’s always a pleasure teaching the lovely people in Cambridge as well. They know me well enough (this is my 4th visit), so it’s easy to connect right away with everyone and get down to teaching. Zzz…

1/17/03 Off to London again to teach the drop-in intermediate class at the Welsh Center. I was running a little late, I thought, but managed to arrive 10 minutes before the lesson started. The host of the milonga, Danny, was very welcoming and accommodating to anything that I would need. I told him I was fine and pretty low maintenance, and that the class would be on milonga. So the class started with about 25 people, and a few concepts later was up to about 100 people! It was one of the largest classes I’ve taught – it becomes a little more like entertaining a crowd, as it’s almost impossible to really help any one person out beyond inspiring them to dance/learn more, which luckily for me is one of the easiest things I can manage. People came up to me after the class and said they enjoyed it – “…so nice, the little details…” or “You have some very imaginative imagery…” were a few comments. I had a very enjoyable rest of the evening, and would definitely consider teaching there again if they wanted me. Caught the 10:51pm train back to Cambridge, a little tipsy after being invited to two glasses of wine on an empty stomach.

1/18/03 Off in the morning to give classes at a tango retreat north of Cambridge in a little place called Bylaugh. The owners of the retreat, Steven and Muffy, had a great vision to remodel an old set of buildings (some of which are still ruins with ivy growing around the sides and trees growing in the middle). Luckily for us they are also interested in dancing tango and were very generous in having our group there. Beyond that they were also lovely people to talk with. Steven gave me his opinion on what he liked and disliked about the states, and to my surprise gave me what he liked best first – the sense of free enterprise, and the positive outlook on life that many Americans seem to have. Over the course of the weekend Muffy became addicted to tango – hopefully she won’t blame me later : ) Anyways, the first workshop didn’t go so well, I had to change gears a bit 20 minutes into the class, the rest went ok, but I was completely satisffied with my teaching. We had a break, in which I taught a private lesson and then the next class, on musicality, started. This one went really well. I always get a little nervous before teaching the class – though I don’t know why because they always seem to be some of my best classes. There was a milonga in the evening, which was nice, but I turned in early because I was a little beat.

1/19/03 Four more hours of workshops the first 2 on milonga piece of cake, really, when I teach milonga I feel totally at ease before the class, during the class, and afterwards as well. Seemed like everyone enjoyed it – they even seemed to get the traspie bit as well, which is typically when disaster strikes during a milonga class. The second class, “Alex cocktail,” was also very nice. It was basically a beginning class for more advanced dancers, how to extend and step nicely, leading before going, and some fun stuff to do with ochos. Afterwards we went back to Steven and Muffy’s place for dinner (the second time they had us over, thanks S& M!), the best risotto I think I’ve ever had in my life. Chatted a little, relaxed a little, showered and went to bed.

1/20/03 Drove back early in the morning to arrive in Cambridge on time to give some private lessons. In the evening the class was called “Tango Laboratory” – the scoop being to give ideas more than movement. This was a toughy to prepare, because also I had no idea what the level would be. I thought hard about it and realized that it would be an unwise move to try to get beginners/intermediates to research too many ideas – as their bodies wouldn’t quite yet be prepared and they might get ahead of themselves without a good foundation. Nevertheless I decided to go ahead and prepare a totally new class on the theme of “space” in tango. It was built mainly around exercises of going to new places, going to where the other person was, will be, or is, and seemed to go deep into a sort of sacada theory, or great way of finding new possibilities for sacadas and barridas. I don’t know how the class was received – two people came up to me afterwards and said they enjoyed it very much, but I got the feel that it also left a lot of people perhaps a little confused. Oh well, you live and you learn

1/21/03 More privates during the day and rushing to get to class in the evening a drop-in intermediate class before the milonga in which we went over the ocho cortado. Nice class, nice people, nice milonga (way to go Mike and Steph – incredible how the community has been built up so nicely in Cambridge!)

1/22/03 Gave Mike and Steph some coaching early in the morning and then headed back to London, gave a private (shoulders M, and music S!), and then taught the intermediate drop-in class. Gave a class on milonga -- it went smooth as butter and the crowd seemed to enjoy it. Nice dancing afterwards and Os gave us a ride home.

1/23/03 - High noon I caught the flying trans-Atlantic sardine can back to Portland via the only airport in world named after a bush... Home sweet home, aah...